Divorce is rarely easy. It’s the legal end of a relationship that was once built on love, commitment, and the promise to stand by each other for life. Whether the decision is mutual or one-sided, it’s an emotional rollercoaster filled with uncertainty, stress, and even grief. But sometimes, ending a marriage is the best path forward. When staying together does more harm than good, divorce can be a necessary step toward a healthier, happier future.
Beyond the emotional weight, divorce comes with legal responsibilities that can feel overwhelming. There are financial assets to divide, child custody matters to settle (if you have children), and legal documents to navigate. Understanding the process can make it easier and less intimidating.
This guide will walk you through every stage, from hiring the right attorney to finalizing the divorce so you can move forward with confidence.
Why Hiring the Right Divorce Attorney Matters
Divorce is not just about ending a marriage; it’s about protecting your rights and securing a fair outcome. A skilled divorce attorney can make a significant difference in how the process unfolds. They provide legal expertise, guide you through paperwork, and negotiate settlements that align with your best interests.
One of the most important factors when choosing a lawyer is experience. Family law can be complex, and having an attorney who understands the nuances of divorce cases can help prevent costly mistakes. For example, Nicole Burns, who has over 23 years of experience in divorce law, leads her team at Burns Family Law P.A. with a hands-on approach. She prioritizes open communication and remains involved at every stage of the process, ensuring her clients have the guidance they need.
In addition to legal expertise, a good attorney should be someone you feel comfortable working with. Divorce is a deeply personal matter, and having a lawyer who listens, understands your concerns and advocates for your needs can make the experience far less overwhelming.
Filing the Divorce Petition: The First Legal Step
The official divorce process begins with filing a divorce petition, also known as a complaint for divorce. This document includes essential details about the marriage, such as the names of both spouses, the date of marriage, the reason for divorce, and any initial requests regarding property division, child custody, or alimony.
Once the petition is filed, it must be served to the other spouse. The receiving spouse then has a set amount of time—usually 20 to 30 days—to respond. If they fail to respond, the court may proceed with a default judgment, which means the filing spouse may be granted the terms they requested in the petition.
It’s crucial to ensure that all paperwork is completed accurately and on time. Any errors or missed deadlines can delay the process and lead to unnecessary complications. An attorney can help navigate this step, ensuring that all legal requirements are met from the start.
Temporary Orders: Managing Life During the Divorce
Divorce cases can take months or even years to resolve, which is why temporary orders are often necessary. These court-issued directives establish temporary arrangements for child custody, spousal support, child support, and financial responsibilities while the divorce is pending.
For example, if one spouse is the primary caregiver of the children but relies on the other spouse for financial support, the court may issue a temporary child support order to ensure the children’s needs are met. Similarly, if one spouse moves out and needs financial assistance to cover rent or mortgage payments, temporary spousal support can be requested.
Temporary orders provide structure and stability, preventing disputes over finances or parental responsibilities from escalating.
Dividing Assets and Debts: Who Gets What?
Property division is often one of the most contentious aspects of divorce. Every state follows either community property or equitable distribution laws, which determine how assets and debts are divided.
In community property states, all marital assets and debts are split equally between the spouses. This means that everything acquired during the marriage—income, real estate, investments, and even debts—is divided 50/50, regardless of who earned more or managed the finances.
In equitable distribution states, property is divided based on what is fair. Courts consider factors like how long you were married, what each spouse’s financial contribution was, and what their future earning potential is. This means that one spouse may receive a larger share of assets if they sacrificed career opportunities to support the family.
Beyond legal statutes, couples can negotiate their own settlement through mediation or collaborative divorce. If they reach an agreement, they can avoid a lengthy court battle. However, if disputes arise, the court will make the final decision on asset division.
Mediation vs. Litigation: Which is Right for You?
Not all divorces have to be settled in court. Many couples choose mediation as an alternative to litigation because it is typically faster, less expensive, and less adversarial. Mediation involves both spouses working with a neutral third party to resolve disputes regarding property division, child custody, and support arrangements. This approach encourages open communication and often leads to more amicable agreements.
However, mediation is not suitable for every situation. If there are major conflicts, such as disputes over high-value assets or cases involving domestic abuse, litigation may be necessary. In a litigated divorce, both parties hire attorneys to represent them in court, and a judge makes the final decisions on contested issues. While litigation can be lengthy and costly, it ensures that legal rights are protected when negotiations fail.
Choosing between mediation and litigation depends on the level of cooperation between spouses. Those who can communicate and compromise may benefit from mediation, while others dealing with complex disputes may require a court’s intervention.
Finalizing the Divorce: The Last Step
Once all issues are resolved, the final step in the divorce process is obtaining a divorce decree. This legal document, issued by the court, outlines the agreed-upon terms, including asset division, child custody, and support arrangements. Once the decree is signed by a judge, the marriage is officially dissolved.
Even after the divorce is finalized, there may be post-divorce matters to handle. These include updating legal documents, such as wills and insurance policies, changing last names if desired, and closing joint bank accounts.
While finalizing the divorce provides legal closure, emotional healing takes time. The process can be overwhelming, but having a clear understanding of post-divorce responsibilities can help make the transition smoother.
The road to divorce is filled with challenges, but understanding the legal steps can make it more manageable. While the process can be emotionally and financially draining, having the right legal support and resources can make it less stressful. Whether through mediation or litigation, finding a fair resolution is key to moving forward. Divorce is not just about ending a marriage—it’s about setting the foundation for a new beginning. With the right mindset and support, life after divorce can be a fresh start toward a brighter future.